We ordered beer. And she paid the bill, my crazy middle class girl who followed me to the suburbs

running away from I don't know what, I still don't understand.

Even after all these years I still don't understand you. But I still remember your blonde oxygenated hair.

 and our desire not to leave there, to continue our journey for two more

weeks. Just two more weeks until you remember you have a boyfriend, abandon me, ignore me

over the phone, pretending not to know me, forgetting the whole trip, that he left the medicine in my

house and the t-shirt and memories that fell behind my bed while you were licking me and I was moaning and

you on top of me wanting to penetrate me through the bones.

Too bad you left me in the hotel room alone and the empty pizza box and this horrible straight movie.

 Maybe you're with someone else, but I don't believe it was you crossing the traffic light,

face of someone who has become serious.

Okay, I've gotten used to it too, but I still wear the underwear you didn't give me and I still haven't learned how to

menstruate and I still haven't learned that I can't have sex for the first time on the first date while I'm

menstruating. And that I must do the seduction ritual, deal with the young ladies, be delicate and

understanding, living the scent of eroticism and not porn, even if we were pure porn and I yours

moça King Lady post porn,

I still don't understand why it's better to have no deodorant and old clothes, instead of that horrible dress.

 that made you laugh at me. All this stupid pose that I'm living now, this face

clean, this non-drug use, this intelligence that makes me useless in bed and prevents me from

write verses, those verses that made me want and willing to fuck everything up,

literally, kamikaze abyss on top of you. My madness, horny Aries with ascendant in

Aries with my Aries with Leo ascendant on top of you.

I remember that we decided to die and that I am sober. Whoever sees me today would not believe the pain that

I turned around, but that's okay. The movie didn't work out, nothing here worked out. I'm already far from those memories,

of this cheap motel room. Our transvestite friend became Barbie and I fell in love with who you

I would hate it. I loved the clean, the concept and even the academic, but it didn't work out either, it ended.

Here I am making plans to leave, abandon all of you, all the remains and this house.

filthy, And here I am masturbating and thinking about you.

Damn, why did I freak out and abandon everything for the thousandth time?

I still don't understand why they thought I was prostituting myself. Just because I was at three in the morning

morning at the bus station trying to get to my house? They kicked me out of the old, dirty, plastic chair

half broken just because I fell asleep and became homeless until they woke me up and

treat like a dirty, smelly dog. A lost animal in the middle of nowhere, counting coins

for the watery, sugar-filled coffee. At least the cashier let me stay there, at least

Man Xing Ling smiled at me after I bought some random trinket to make me

wash your face in your bathroom warehouse full of boxes.

Luckily, I gave up on crossing that filthy walkway that smelled of piss, as usual as it is.

I stop there in the middle of the night trying to get home ignoring all this which is disgusting and useless.

I went back to Rio, slept on the bus and realized that all this junk of mine is a bit too much, voluptuous and

excessive.